ENGLAND'S GREEN AND...

A U-turn and a return ‘home’ to the North-East of England was never a manoeuvre I was ever expecting to make, and such a shift in the way Britain ‘swings’ was never something I ever expected to witness. Both matters are true however, and although the move back here to Newcastle in particular could be said to have been enforced and riddled with regrets, on both counts there is both good and bad.

It’s some seven or more years since I headed off down the A1 with, it’s got to be said, a swagger in the old soul and a beautiful young wife on my arm, or rather driving the old Peugeot she’d loved before and long after she’d fallen in and out of love with me; and like the marriage itself, living in the sunny climes of Cambridgeshire seems like a short interlude now (however nice a break it was) on the way to something much bigger and better – something.., well.., true – something, permanent!

Well, we all more or less know, nothing lasts for ever, but three or so years living in Poland continues to feel like short change for what it promised and forgot to fulfil, and the transformation in such a short time away has me looking at the changes here in England with eyes agape and an ache for the times before!

The loss of both my mother and father aside while away, then living abroad was on the whole a fantastic experience, and leaving aside the obvious loss of the most important thing to have happened to me to-date, I’ve got to say that I quite simply miss my life out there, a life which I’ve got to say rates better than any previous – a life that, when particularly in Warsaw, felt at home with itself perhaps for the first time ever!

And here we are now. ‘Home’ is pushing the term, for although, as far as I trust my eyes, the very fabric of the place hasn’t changed, any familiarity however has become more than blurred!

Newcastle/Gateshead Quayside

It’s got to be said that I’m looking at this as a good thing, for familiarity perhaps does breed contempt after-all, and contempt is the very last thing on my mind. It’s this new strangeness that I’d say gets me out of bed when I could so easily wallow in the continuing misery of losing both parents and Dominika so recently, and it’s the peculiarity of the ‘new’ England which instigates a continuation of what has become the journey of a life time - Life in Poland and what went with it should have ended in death otherwise and, well, death isn’t an option – not for this old bugger anyway. Hey, we all need to suffer for our art, don’t we ;-)
It would be easier to suggest that the last few years have seen big changes in me rather than the wholesale alteration of England itself. There’s a massive truth in this of course, but I’d live and die by the fact that life here is indeed a hell of a lot different from how it was just a matter of three or four years ago.

The forthcoming recession or perhaps even the ‘loss’ of Blare might have a lot to do with it, but I reckon there’s something more fundamental happening. Some call it the intrusion of the nanny state, I’d call it the lying down of the populous – the acceptance of what’s best for the state at the detriment of personal freedoms and the approval of puritanical behaviour! Yet, Brits being Brits and there continues to be an underlying rebellion or rather consequence, and what used to be acceptable letting of pressure, now sees the whole of Britain gripped by hysteria and totally smashed in its spare time – literally drunk regardless of background – although those in fright like to think the current need for the masses to be off its tits most of the time is refined to the under-classes and susceptible young! Wrong! Britain is getting drunk because it doesn’t like being told what to do while believing what its being told is after-all, good for it! Contradictions – and there in lies the fun…

AND NEWCASTLE ITSELF..?

Newscastle - Grey Street from Monument

Well, being Red and White to the core so the footy team aside, Newcastle is a surprisingly fantastic revelation for me, as I’ve dreaded the thought of a return, and the place has grown as a cosmopolitan centre beyond expectation since I last lived here. It goes without saying, but it’s great to have close friends at hand too, and living in Jesmond, however temporary it might turn out to be, leaves a warm glow in the belly. For those of you who don’t know Newcastle, Jesmond is generally thought of as a sort after part of the city which, with its own centre of shops, library, swimming pool, bars, cafés and the like, is a fantastic part of Newcastle consisting of a mixture of the city’s professionals and posh students – your loud rugby types when it comes to boys being the downside, but on the upside, rather gorgeous young ‘debutants’ when it comes to eye candy!

Starbucks in Jesmond

Inevitably, I’ve also made some new, and truly interesting acquaintances down at the local, and although The Lonsdale itself has suffered like most real pubs because of the smoking ban in the way of atmosphere, it boasts an outdoor seating area along with its own heaters (needed during what’s turning out to be a shitty summer weather-wise) which allows for enough socialization not to destroy the local fabric of culture or the feeling of community amongst the adults. In essence there remains a little corner of ‘old’ England to allow for the continuation of good craic and thankfully, there’s enough bars around following suit, for the atmosphere within, although after-all healthier (though the smells within suggest otherwise) and kiddie friendly (not altogether a bad thing), IS as sterile as waiting for a bloody bus!

Yup, life could be a lot worse and is certainly starting to look up again regardless of the fact I’m getting nowhere in acquiring council accommodation, (I called in at the housing department the other day to discover that the last two places I ‘biddered’ for I was 36 and 52 in line) and the temporary work has just come to an end.

AND WORK..?

Kids on the Project

... Although I’ve always had mixed feelings about Community Arts and just what it really achieves in the community as regard to promoting anything much beyond having a bit of a laugh, I’ve got to admit to having really enjoyed my recent role as Project/Studio Assistant and have somewhat been converted to the joys of working with kids regardless!

And if you leave aside (for those of us who can remember our early teens) the forgivable indifference of the older groups who while manoeuvring their way through puberty had little energy left in them beyond their own interest in one another, the younger kids and those from the local special needs school clearly did get something from their days out. I’m still not altogether sure what this something was/is in the way of understanding the fine-arts, artists, or the role of either, but they left having clearly achieved something and experiencing ways of working which quite simply they don’t get to do at school?

Despite a certain amount of restrictions imposed by both venue and time, you can’t fault the efforts of the artist’s and the staff I’ve had the pleasure of working with either. All involved put in so much more of an effort and expertise beyond what you could call duty and could perhaps be said to be born out of passing on something of what they love.

Yes, I learnt a lot about how ‘this thing’ works and found out a lot more about myself that I’m not sure was there before the project began, what, two months ago.

I’ll definitely miss all I’ve met, but I take something away with me which I won’t be so soft as to express here!